So, my little one today is Adam Sandler. I have just finished watching a hilarious comedy starring this incredible guy. I love his movies. You know why? Because he manages to mix all the elements a good film should have. He sends a message using a universal language that can be understood by everybody: humor. So, well done, Adam Sandler!
Today’s movie was That’s my boy. So, apparently is just a very dirty comedy with a lot of cliches, but his unique talent is that he can turn classical cliches into really original moments. And if you have more than two neurons, you can actually read the message between the lines. For example in this movie I have just watched is talking about the relationships between parents and children. I won’t let myself trapped into the legends of the fall to believe that there are perfect families. Since God put us on Earth, kids had problems with parents, parents between parents, kids with their brothers… hell, Eve got Adam into the biggest shit ever and Cain killed Abel… or the other way around… Whatever… one brother killed the other brother!
So, we don’t have the perfect families, and maybe our parents weren’t the role models that we see in insurance or toothpaste commercials. Yeah, life sucks, it’s not the yogurt add where all the family sits in the morning and has breakfast and they kiss one other wishing a good day. Maybe some fathers are losers and alcoholics and some mothers are pitiless or whores, but… as my dear cousin said once, we can’t choose our family… wise words. Except that she continued with…but you can ignore that you have it. That’s true also, but is it really the best thing to do? At that moment I thought she was a bitch telling me this as the consequence of a fight we had (and never spoken since then…6 years or so) but when I look closely I realize that I’m the supreme bitch. Because there are also more than 5 years since I talked to my father. And it all started from money. Short: I was having the right to alimony (yeah, they are divorced since I was 2 or 3), I went directly in court without talking to him first, he was all pissed off, we fought, I won, I got the alimony, after that we fought again, this time he won… he did not come to my marriage or my daughter baptism, bla bla bla… in the mean time I gave an interview in the local press (we might say he is a sort of a public figure in the town) denigrating him… a lot… hmm, when I write it down, it seems that I wasn’t the only victim… what the fuck, Adam Sandler, what have you done with your stupid movie??? Leave my thoughts alone. I’m the victim, I’m the child. He supposed to look after me. He supposed to provide me. He supposed to be there when I needed him. He supposed to be there when he had his visiting hours and not letting me wait hours and hours on the balcony just hoping to have a glance of him!
I’m fucking pissed off!!! I’m furious!! And all my life I hated him for not loving me! Why?? What have I done?? My only mistake was to be born… I know it sounds very melodramatic, B class movie style… but sometimes life is not all A class. Life sometimes sucks! And because of our stupid pride, we let it suck even more! Because we see a little tiny lint on someone’s coat, but we don’t see the straw in our eye… see my point? Well, I don’t like where this is leading to, so I am going to stop right now with the subject… that is my father!
Than, I’ll really need a shrink! Let’s talk about my mother… or let’s save it for another time. That will be too much childhood drama in only one night and I’m no fucking Freud right now.
So, my point was, family problems exist. They are real. If we try to ignore them, they will not disappear. It will only grow deeper and deeper and you’ll end up like me: screwed up. Yeah, I don’t wanna remember my teenage wild era. I have some memories that I would not particularly want to share with… let’s say… my kid, for example? There are a lot of things going through my head right now and I find it difficult to settle at one so I think it’s better to take advantage that everyone’s asleep and just enjoy my precious moment of silence!
Sometimes that’s all you need. Just peace and quiet. I will always stand for this cause. Having time with yourself. There are moments when you just don’t wanna open your mouth and talk to anybody. You just wanna be left alone. Yeah, I’m sure those around me don’t get it much, but it doesn’t mean I’m upset, it doesn’t mean I’m tired, it doesn’t mean I’m not in the mood, it doesn’t I have my periods (those times can be really ugly), it means just I don’t feel like talking. Is that a crime? Does this make me a bad person? NO! Everyone needs a break from time to time..We’re not machines… Even the engines need to have a break, if not, they explode!!!
It’s OK to have a break. To let your mind rest and your thoughts settle down. Meditate, but in the classical way…contemplate at something not in the Osho way, where you should just… don’t think! (but if that suites you better, go for it) Living in the city gives us no time or opportunity to not hear anything, so I’ll turn down my laptop and enjoy the… silence! /
beingroma 